Stop right there. This gift guide is not for the faint of heart. Definitely not for people who give a lot of fucks about things like…. cussing. Run along…go to another gift guide. These are the funny secret Santa gift ideas. the funny white elephant gift ideas. The gift for your best friend that you didn’t know she needed (or he!). This is the gift guide for cool gifts, for that cool friend of yours who has zero fucks to give and isn’t taking on anymore.
This is a gift guide for the badass. The boss bitch. The mother fucking beast mode human being or just regular old fucking beast.
IDGAF. (what does IDGAF mean? I. Don’t. Give. A. Fuck.)
Some of the links below contain affiliate linking, which means that at no extra cost to you, I may earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase. You can read my full disclosure policy here.
If you’ve got a loved one in your life who could stand a bit more joy and has run out of fucks to give then this is the gift guide for you.
Let’s get into this shit.
I love these bracelets as gifts for the girls. I have the “keep fucking going” one that an activist friend of mine gave me and our squad of MOMS Demand Action for Gun Violence in America supporters.
I have this one. I love it.
Shout out to all my fellow resisters and brothers.
I love the subtlty of this. Work appropriate and yet fully supportive of your zero-fucks-mood after Carl takes credit for that idea you had…again.
And another spin on beautiful DGAF sentiments, but with a slightly different design.
This is the book that I was reading when I decided to launch this blog. The name is an ode to the fucks I do have to give as a parent. And it’s a must-read.
This is some straight stress reduction meets no fucks given genius in a coloring book.
(there are dozens more. Check some of them out below! 🙂
Because people who have no more fucks to give do still need to hydrate:
They are also more than likely going to imbibe. Which I fully support. This wine glass is epic and I need it in my life.
If you’re sick of having your shit all the way in chaos get it all the fuck together with this planner for real badasses. Get your shit done. Get the fuck on with your life.
Nearly everything I do as a parent and as a worker is rooted in gratitude. And this journal is fucking genius as it combines my need to be hyper-focused on the fucks I want to give, and also manifest some more of the shit I want in my life (like money, and love, and more joy. All of the joy).
Just wear these to your next family gathering and the second someone starts talking nonsense about how Nancy Pelosi is going to take away your social security to pay for the impeachment go ahead and sit back with your fuck this shit Tumblr and kick up your feet with these comfy cozy socks. Sure. It’s passive-aggressive AF. But sometimes that’s the only way to keep the peace in a divided family.
His AND hers.
I love the mindfulness message of this book and diet mentality. And also, how many times have we all been on a diet and thought “fuck it.” This book takes it to another level and really embraces a mindset that’s ready for weight loss, with a side of less fucks.
There’s nothing more zen then being out of all the fucks you have to give. It’s the most zen you will ever be. Ask me how I know;).
Journal for practicing the mindful art of not giving a shit
This candle is both going to be good for the environment, good for your soul and also summon your inner badass and do whatever the fuck you want.
See above re: some stupid shit your racist Uncle decides to say about the border. alternatively…. you could wear these to the company holiday party? Under your shoes (so as not to draw attention) and just KNOW that Joan from HR who always knows everything about everything and has the latest greatest tip that you must know or do or try or go…know that you’re comfy, cozy, and mentally two feet out the door.
Please don’t get fired by purchasing any of these as gifts. Only you know your company culture.
There’s something that tickles me so hard about the juxtaposition of cursing like a sailor (do sailers really curse a lot? I have never spent enough time to know for sure) and also being dolled up to go to the races. Like these fancy as fuck socks. So sweet and perfect for any occasion!
Ohhhhh this is kind of like Marie Kondo Meets Mark Manson meets the DGAF Mom all rolled into one fucking glorious book.
I legit laugh out loud when I see this tumbler. Consider bringing it to your next PFO meeting or other like an appropriate social gathering.
This. Decor. Right. Here. Though.
I need this in my life! I need this in my life to take a nap! A fucking nap!!!
I feel like my kids might give me these coasters as a mother’s day gift down the line so that I don’t have to repeat myself 12341736571 times about them not fucking up the table with their drinks.
What the F*@# Should I Make for Dinner?: The Answers to Life’s Everyday Question (in 50 F*@#ing Recipes)
If you’re not feeding a hoard of kiddos (or have adventurous pallets) these are some fucking delicious recipes that are relatively easy to throw together. Buttttttt kale and bacon don’t tend to be a hit with my kiddos…yet.
I still love it as an option for date night at home and my foodie hubby loves the sass of this book too.
Oh and hey since we’re talking about dinner, if you are in the market for some family friend DGAF style dinners you’re gonna wanna check out this post: What To Make for Dinner When You Just Don’t Give a Fuck
If you’re on the wagon, this mixology book is totally for you. It also happens to be the sequel to the above book. I love the choose your own adventure ideas with so much sass that it’s ridiculous!
This is the kind of mask I love to take naps with. Long, fucking, luxurious naps where no one bothers me. Please go find your awake father and ask him where the stingray toy that you haven’t had any interest in playing with is, please.
Look, it’s almost 2020. You need to know what the fuck is going on. So you need this:
Get your shit together this year. And like every year. And like today. Because you have a fucking calendar to track the shit that needs getting done.
True story we were driving our kids to an eye doctor down in Los Angeles today and some douche bag cut my husband off and he yelled….”What the fuck! What the fuck fuck you asshole!”
And I said with a completely serious tone: You’re dropping a lot of Ef bombs.
He looked at me and said “seriously?”
I said “Most of mine are relegated to the internet. Yours are in front of our kids.”
Pot = Kettle.
Hence why this coffee mug is on my Christmas wish list and also why I may buy a matchy matchy one for my hubby too.
If you want to give someone a flying fuck, just keep this coin on hand. This is HILARIOUS and something I could totally see myself doing out of spite but also for shits and giggles with coworkers. In a sweet and non-threatening way of course;).
IDGAF which above gift idea you decide to purchase, but I do give af about one all encompassing thing: Picking and choosing the fucks that are necessary for me to be a happy, sane, functioning human being.
If you’re into that shit too you’re gonna wanna read some of these posts too:
Other Content from the DGAF Mom
Do me a favor you DGAF goddess. There are other bitches out there who have no idea some of these gift ideas exist and I need you to sound the alarm and help them find this post:).
Copy/paste this URL into your Facebook feed! Tweet it if you wanna. Or even better throw it on up to your favorite boards on Pinterest!
You can use this beautiful fucking pin to do that. Thanks, boo. You’re fucking gorgeous and I love you.